Children do not need adults to panic about the internet, but they do need us to keep up.
The debate about children, rapidly evolving technology and online harm has become urgent. However, urgency can narrow our thinking and current debate risks collapsing critical and complex questions of risk, opportunity, agency and rights into the single, oversimplified question: should children under 16 should be banned from social media? That question matters. A ban might reduce some exposure if it is proportionate, evidence-led and enforceable.
But a ban on its own it will not teach a child how to recognise manipulation, protect themselves from cyberbullying, crucially assess misinformation, threats to the privacy or how to respond to sexual pressure. The most important question to ask ourselves is: what do children need from us as they grow up in a world that is in part lives online, with maturity and experience?
New research commissioned by Google, based on data collected from more than 6,000 teenagers in the UK shows how teenagers are using AI. The report finds that 67% of teens use AI for creative projects daily or almost daily and 65% use it for learning more than once a week. It finds that 77% always or often think about the trustworthiness of information when using the internet or AI for learning.
Young people are asking us to understand that online life is already part of how they learn, socialise, seek support and build identity.
And for 13- to 15-year-olds, while AI is largely a learning tool over 80% saying they would turn to parents for problems such as cyberbullying or privacy issues.
As teenagers grow older, these patterns change. By 16 to 18 AI-use is less about homework and more about life management, self-improvement and transitioning into employment. Older teens are more likely to use AI for language learning, coding and job or internship applications. They are also more sceptical with 52% always verifying trustworthiness and half actively checking for bias. Even with this growing autonomy, they still need adults, with a quarter worrying their parents lack the skills to recognise AI or fake information.
This transition - and insight from teenagers themselves - is a warning: static control is not good safeguarding.
Naturally, there should be stronger regulation of harmful design features like recommender systems that amplify distressing content, compulsive loops like automatic play functions, weak reporting routes, unsafe default settings and products that treat children as if they are adults.
But even with the best regulation, risks will remain and children will still need adults who can talk to them about what they see, help them to interpret what feels confusing and respond calmly when something goes wrong. This is why we should be thinking seriously about a national behaviour change campaign for trusted adults.
A successful campaign could focus on three adult behaviours:
- Ask, without panic. Trusted adults need prompts that open conversation, such as ‘Show me how this works’ or ‘What do you like about it?’ as these questions can help to build trust before a crisis.
- Agree boundaries that grow with the child. Younger teenagers may need safer defaults and limits while older teenagers may need negotiated boundaries and space to practise judgement coupled with support with more complex issues such as AI use or scams.
- Act early and respond without shaming. Many children do not ask for help because they fear punishment, embarrassment or losing access to devices. Adults need a simple script that starts with thanking children for sharing and reassuring them they are not in trouble.
Parents have always helped children to navigate friendship, relationships, education and careers, for children growing up online need that same support and increasing trust and autonomy in digital spaces. The test of success is whether fewer children are harmed and more children can ask for help and children already disadvantaged offline can benefit from technology safely.
Children need adults to keep up, stay close and know what to do when it matters.
